Here’s my entry for ManOfTheHouse.com’s contest, World’s Greatest Dad Challenge. Enjoy!
Archive - SAHD
RSS Feed
Chevy Test Drive in Atlanta – The Varsity
I had the great pleasure of test driving several new Chevy models at the Modern Media Man Summit in Atlanta last week. Several of the other guys there and I were able to hang out with the Manofthehouse.com crew and talk about road trips – with our kids and while growing up. We had a lot of fun in the cars and chowed down on some greasy comfort food at the Varsity. Check it out…
M3 Summit Made Me Lazy
I attended the Modern Media Man Summit in Atlanta last week and met some incredible people. The speakers were awesome and covered a variety of topics, not just the technology or money side of blogging and social media. Often we go to conferences and don’t put what we learn into action when we return to our normal, busy lives. We were asked in a keynote to think of one take-away that we could put to use. For me there were two closely related points made in separate sessions I attended:
- Business around a lifestyle, not the other way around. This was from a session on Friday by Jim Kukral. Jim is the author of Attention! This Book Will Make You Money. Great book that I highly recommend if you are looking for ways to increase exposure, and profits, for you or your products.
- Be lazy. Dave Taylor suggested this little nugget on Saturday. And as we all know, lazy people are really just people that work smarter, not harder, right?
Both points align with the approach of planning my life and then deciding what and where work fits. As a stay-at-home dad I’ve had to work in a way that fits around the top priority of taking care of the kids. With both kids in school, however, I find myself with 30 hours a week I can work! But do I want to work all of those hours? What if I can be lazy and work smarter, say 15 hours a week generating the same or greater revenue? What if I add some new activities (or pickup old ones I let slide while the kids were home) to create a great lifestyle and work in the time that’s left? Who wouldn’t want that?
It serves as a great reminder to put some constraints on the amount of time I work while the kids are in school. I had been so excited this past month that I did work pretty much from the time I dropped them off until I left to pick them up 6 hours later. Constraints force us to work with what we have. If I only give myself 15 hours a week to get things done, I better be lazy and find a more efficient way to meet my commitments and goals.
Do you plan your work around your lifestyle? Are you lazy, in a lean, efficient and smart way?
What are your best tips for being lazy?
Family Matters
I had the privilege yesterday to see Zig Ziglar speak at the Get Motivated seminar in Raleigh. There were other great speaks and leaders presenting, but Zig is the man I wanted to hear. Zig is 83 and after a fall several years ago suffers from short term memory loss. His daughter accompanied him on stage and they do an interview format. She asks him leading questions and he shares his insights and wisdom. Zig did repeat himself several times, but I think it was because the point was so important: family matters.
Several times Zig alluded to the fact that he loved his wife, affectionately referred to as the redhead, and that his kids always knew their parents’ relationship was a priority. He stated kids can sense when things are amiss between parents. And if our country is going last and improve, it has to start with the family.
I don’t think anyone would argue that raising kids in a healthy family is the most beneficial for all involved. The keyword there is healthy, though. Not everyone is in a healthy family situation and people have to make hard choices, and be willing to live with the consequences of those choices. Healthy is hard. It requires effort and sustained investment.
It’s not always easy and there’s no crystal ball to determine how our efforts will unfold, but the benefits for kids and parents are well worth the time and energy we expend.
If you’re married with kids, are you doing what you can to create a healthy environment for everyone?
If single with kids, are you investing in yourself so you can be whole and healthy for yourself and the kids?
Giving Your Kids Choices
Recently we’ve had some issues with our daughter not listening very well. Mostly this is happening at school where she continues to talk when asked to be quiet. We’ve tried bribing her with new earrings, clothes, new shoes and dessert, all things that we thought would speak to her interests and passions. Unfortunately, she couldn’t care less about those things. She doesn’t seem to make the connection between her actions and the consequences. I think part of it is that earning a sticker on her work in kindergarten or having a note sent home don’t seem to mean that much to her. My wife and I have tried to find different consequences that would get through to her, but nothing seems to be working.
So I asked a friend who counsels families what he thought would be a good approach. His advice was to give her choices. Instead of saying “you need to not talk at school so you can get a sticker from your teacher” or “you need to be quiet at home so your dad doesn’t lose his mind”, we need to present her with two well defined options. For example, “You can choose to be quiet at school and you will be able to watch 30 minutes of TV when you get home. If you choose to not be quiet at school, then you are choosing not to watch TV.” He told me this is a great way to get kids to see that it is a choice they have. It empowers them to make the right decision and leaves us as parents with the responsibility of doling out the appropriate consequence. Either way, the choice is theirs.
I find it too easy to just say “clean your room” or “put your toys away” without specifying what the alternative choice is. I should say “If you choose to put your toys away then you can go outside to play for an extra 15 minutes and if you choose to not put your toys away then you are choosing to go to bed 15 minutes early.” It’s a lot more work upfront, for my feeble mind, but it pays spades on the back end. At least that’s what my friend said.
I know I learned this in one of the parenting books I read a long time ago, but I guess it got lost in the madness. Do you give your kids “choices” like this? Does it work for you in helping them relate their actions to the consequences?